I remember mentioning in one of my very first blog posts that I wasn’t sure when you could refer to yourself as ‘heavily pregnant’?! Now, I know that 38 weeks is definitely this (between myself and a friend we decided that as soon as you start making noises when you get up or down then you are definitely in the heavily pregnant club…), but today has just confirmed that not only am I heavily pregnant but I look ridiculous with it!
I’m talking the waddle, clinging onto the husbands arm to cross the road, taking 5 minutes to get up off any form of seat, you get the gist! As I was dropped off outside Boots/Primark/the cinema, due to my complete inability to walk any distance, I just had to laugh at myself and the craziness of the situation!
Now…Lyla weighed a very healthy 8lb 14oz at birth, but my midwife seems to think that this baby is going to be nowhere near as heavy as her (we are guessing between 8lb and 8lb 6oz ish)….does she want to try carrying her?! Seriously I am huge. My belly is huge, my arse is huge, my boobs are huge (hooray, finally), I AM HUGE. I don’t know whether that’s why I feel so ready to get her out? Who knows! What I do know is that to the outside world I definitely look like someone who is ‘milking’ (a more appropriate term could not be found in my mind) being heavily pregnant. You know like when you see someone who has hurt their leg and wants the whole world to know, so exaggerates the limp just to draw attention to it but ends up putting more weight through the injured limb, yeah that.
As well as not being able to walk, other ‘symptoms’ include:
- Being unable to bend down, at all
- Having to roll out of bed
- Not being able to eat anything without swigging Gaviscon immediately after (so then getting rid of the taste of the delicious chocolate just consumed)
- Coughing and then immediately needing to wee
- Crying at everything (and I mean, everything)
- Wanting to sleep ALL the time, but then as soon as your head hits the pillow you start writing a complete novel in your head
- Bowel ‘troubles’
The list goes on…
I will stop moaning now (I will, I promise), as I know the end is SO close for me, being booked in for a C-Section. But basically, what I am trying to say is – to those women that make it to 40+ weeks, I salute you, you are machines! Seriously.